Can Friends Become Lovers?

A recent discussion with a dear friend of mine and then with another friend of mine has raised the age old question for me... Can a man and woman, who've been friends for years, become lovers and still remain friends (even if the romantic relationship fails)?

Of course the common reaction to the question seems to be a resounding NO. But I don't think that I agree.

We often hear people say that the best kind of long term relationship starts out with the two people being friends, because when the heat and passion of an early romance fizzles out what you are left with is the friendship of the two people to sustain the long haul of the relationship.

I tend to fall into the category that believes in the friends first logic. But the friends first logic can't seem to truly apply since every person I've ever met who has fallen in love with a long term friend has found themselves too terrified to take the next step for fear of losing the friendship.

Now, is the reality of this dilemma created because the parties involved don't have that much faith in their friendship? Are so many of us fooled into believing we are really close to someone, but inside we know that our friendship is not that strong?

Isn't the possibility of a lifetime with someone so close to you worth the risk of losing it forever? Aren't you denying your true self if you can't even go after what your heart longs for?

Am I just rambling now? I don't know.

Maybe I should try to sleep...

ALWAYS A BRIDE'S MAID...

So the EMMY's came and went. And once again I was left out in the dark as the light of recognition shone upon someone else.

But, you know what? I don't care. I didn't even expect to get nominated this year, and I didn't do the project for anyone but myself and my friends and family. And last I checked, they still like it, and so do I. I guess the Academy liked it too. Otherwise it wouldn't have even been nominated, now would it?

Things have been real busy at Digital-Workshop. I'm pulling some insanely long hours.

But, it's all worth it. I don't mind working my ass off when my boss is so cool. (I'm my own boss, get it?)

Anyway, that's all for today. Maybe I'll post some more tomorrow.

-Burma

I DON'T GET IT

Why is it some people feel the need to just blow in and out of your perfectly happy day with their troubles blaring out of them like trumpets leading a charge?

And why is it these same people don't stick around long enough to talk out their problems with you, to actually try and come to some happy conclusion? They blow in, vent on you (usually making you feel like your responsible for whatever problem it is they have) and then they blow on out. Having thoroughly destroyed your good mood in the process, they leave you reeling in a sea of confusion, worry and bitterness...

It makes no sense to me. If you are so unhappy, why bring others down with you? Why pop into someone's day just long enough to F*ck them up and then leave? Do these people try to mess up the highest possible number of people in a day by doing "drive-by bad moods"?

I don't know. It's sad. I used to do it too. I'd walk into a room with someone, usually someone who was having a decent enough day, and I'd just trample all over their good mood for about five minutes and then I'd run off. Usually claiming it's better I spend this time by myself.

Of course, I never apologized to that person for, quite effectively, ruining their good mood. Honestly, I guess in those days it never occured to me.

And now, today, I can't relate at all to that kind of person anymore. I mean, if you're going to stomp on someone's bliss parade, you might want to stick around and see if they can help. Don't just trounce on their good vibes.

Good vibes are just as infectious as bad ones. Maybe by giving them a little time to recover, they can infect you with some of their positivity?

Just a thought...

DOWN WITH LOVE

I'm listening to the "Down With Love" soundtrack. What a delightful movie it was. I've seen it twice. I think I'm falling into the Ewan McGregor fandom realm. (In a totally, "I admire his acting choices as being brave and bold," kind of way.)

The EMMY's are a week from tonight. Should be a gas. I'm going with my wonderful friend Sheryl. I'm sure she will look absolutely stunning that night. She's the type of girl who makes wearing a pair of jeans and a T-Shirt look positively sophisticated. I only hope the large guy accompanying her looks more like her date than like her bodyguard.

I rented my tux yesterday. Teesa helped me pick it out. And by help, I mean decided for me. It is a straight black tux. The coat is a 3/4 length coat, so it's long. I've really wanted to wear a long coat tux for a while. The shirt, and vest are both black and it's topped off with a red satin neck-tie. I go in Thursday to pick it up. Hopefully it'll look as good on me as we hope.

I guess it needs repeating, but this is the third dance with the EMMY I've had. And I don't think she's going home with me once again. But, unlike last year, I don't mind that so much this year. I know what my movie was, is, and what it means to me, and winning an award just isn't so important to me this time. I didn't make this one for the EMMY people like we did last year. This movie was more about me and my friends and family, doing something we enjoyed, together. It was an attempt to stretch ourselves on a technical standpoint. Story took a backseat. And on purpose. It wasn't about the story so much as it was about trying new things.

And I think we did a bang-up job on it. We had a great time shooting it, we pulled off some special effects we never thought we'd manage to do and we created some fond memories of time we all spent together. What more is there to any of this than that?

Anyway. Next week. I'll let you all know how it went, next week.

Ciao...

OH! Don't forget to check out Kurt's Blog!