My ongoing recollection of my 2003 trip to Alaska continues...
The Great Adventure
Part 3
So Dad's on board with me going to Alaska. Strange. Definitely not the reaction I expected.
But I only have the remainder of my Friday to prep myself for the bitter cold of Alaska, leaving me no time to dwell on my Dad.
I take the money he loans me and I rush out the door. As I'm heading out Dad says, "There's a thrift store in Old Encinitas. I bet you can find pants and jackets there pretty cheap."
Still dumbfounded I thank my Dad and head out the door.
A million thoughts are racing through my head as I navigate the streets of my neighborhood and head towards downtown Encinitas. Streets that I learned to drive on. Streets that I know so well, I don't have to pay very much attention to get where I'm going. Streets that allow me some time to second guess my decision to go to Alaska.
"What am I thinking? Alaska? Do you know what you're doing Dave? You've never been to Alaska. You've never even truly been on a boat. Sure you've done the whale watching cruises and played around on a river boat at Three Rivers. But a "seafaring vessel"? You don't know anything about that! You're going to go up there and get yourself and everyone else on that ship killed!"
My nerves are quickly getting the best of me. I must calm down. I mean how hard can it be to work on a boat at sea? Not to say it's easy work, because it's not. But it can't be that difficult to learn. I'll be fine. Besides, being a seaman is in my blood. After all, I'm the son of a sailor!
At last I arrive at the thrift shop. There is plenty of clothes here for me. Denim jackets, pants, sweaters. I completely load up on warm clothes. The first true set of warm clothes I've bought in years. I mean really, how often do I dress warm in So. Cal.? Not very! I usually can get away with my soccer sweatsuits and windbreakers.
But Alaska? That's a whole new game baby! They have glaciers and snow up there!
I pay for my clothes and explain to the friendly woman behind the counter all that has happened in the previous 15 hours or so. She smiles warmly at my enthusiasm and gives me a polite, "You are an adventurous spirit aren't you," as she hand me my bag and receipt. I get the feeling she didn't really care about my story at all. But at least she was nice about it.
So with bag in hand I head into the car and head to Becky's house to meet up with Jason as we tell all our friends the news.
-Dave
8/08/2004
7/21/2004
"And you run and you rush to catch up with the sun, but it's sinking"
My good friend Daniel suggested I start to write down the stories I always talk about... I'm not sure if I should write these in a past tense or like I'm still in that time... I'll just free write it and see how it goes. So here we go...
The Great Adventure
Part 1
Mid June 1993
So I've been out of high school for a month now. I've been enjoying my summer, for the most part. It has been made bittersweet by the sudden ending of my year long relationship with Tayva. God I love Tayva. Breaking up with her has been so difficult. I should have seen it coming. I've been so immature about so much of our relationship, I can't blame her for looking for what she needed somewhere else. But for her to leave me after all we shared, and immediately end up with someone else? That's hard to take. But I'm trying to be strong about this, and I'm trying desperately to hang on to all the friends we share. That's not easy since they pretty much all knew her first. I came into this circle because of her, and I'm afraid I'll find myself out of it for the same reason.
Anyway, it's Thursday and nothing much has been going on today. Jason called me tonight and said he had a problem that he needed my opinion on. This has of course made me very pleased, since Jason is one of the friends I am fearful of losing because of my fallout with Tayva. For him to seek my advice on a personal problem is comforting. It means I might not lose all my friends after all.
Jason's problem is, in my opinion, a fairly simple one. He and his father haven't gotten along in years. In fact, his Dad lives in Alaska and Jason rarely sees or hears from him. It seems Jason's dad (Lee), has found himself stranded in Seattle, WA for some reason. I guess he was down there for a job or something, regardless he's had to find himself a way home to Anchorage. Lee hunted around and eventually found a boat that needs a crew for a trip to Anchorage. The boat is an old Navy Land, Craft, Utility (LCU) vessel that was bought by an oil rig company in Anchorage for use as a supply ship. They bought the boat in Santa Barbara and have been piloting it up the West Coast towards Alaska. Somewhere just before they reached Puget Sound they blew out their engines. So the ship and the original crew have been holed up in Westport, WA for three months or so while the engines get rebuilt. As a result, the oil company has recalled the original crew because of a "days out" limit. They reached it weeks ago. So now they need people to man this ship as it travels the Inside Passage and crosses the Gulf of Alaska to get to Anchorage. So Lee got himself on this crew as a means of working while he concurrently makes his way back home.
Ok, so what is Jason's problem exactly? Well... turns out Lee wants Jason to come up and work on the boat with him. The ship needs another deck hand and Lee volunteered Jason for the job. Jason says that they are going to pay him $250/day while he's working, and they'll pay for his flight back home. The only thing he has to pay for is getting to Seattle so that Lee can pick him up and take him over to Westport.
Jason would make enough money to pay for an entire year at the Junior College in a month. Cool, right? I thought so. But Jason doesn't think he can handle a month or two with his Dad on this ship. I asked him how big the ship is. He says it's 135 feet long and three decks. That seems like a big enough place to me. I suggested to Jason that he could handle it, that getting "away" from his father if he needed to wouldn't be that hard. He didn't agree.
I told him he'd be a fool if he didn't take the opportunity to make his next year of college financially easier to handle. He agreed, and said that the thought had already occurred to him. Turns out his request for advice was really turning into a, "help me say no to my father" call. While I understand the desire to flee from one of your parents, I could not, in good conscience, tell him to say no to this opportunity. Besides, it looked to me like his Dad was trying to offer an olive branch.
So I came up with a possible solution.
"Jason, do they have everyone they need? Or might they need another deck hand or something?"
There was a pause as Jason contemplated my questions.
Then he replied, "I don't know. Are you suggesting that you'd go too?"
"Naturally! I need to pay for school next year too. Besides, it sounds like fun."
There was another pause on the other end of the line, then Jason said, "I've got to call them and find out. I really don't know if there is any openings, but I'll ask and call you back!"
With that the line went dead and I began waiting for Jason's call. It's now 11:30pm and I haven't heard from Jason since that call a few hours back. I guess the answer was no. Either that, or Jason told his father to bugger off and he doesn't want to hear my objections to that. Whatever. I'm going to bed.
Part 2
So this morning I woke up around 8am. I still haven't heard from Jason and it's almost 10:30am now. It's Friday, so I'm naturally spending my day just lounging around the house. Dad's home. He's been home a lot since he was laid off by General Physics. It's interesting. He's working for himself now, doing Independent Contracting stuff. He seems happier, even though his income isn't as regular or as high as it was before. I really think the freedom of controlling your own destiny may have something to do with his more relaxed attitude.
10:30, the phone rings.
"Hello?"
"Dave! They need someone else, so my Dad got you hired!"
"Really? That's cool. So I guess we are going to do this then, huh Jason?"
"Yeah. I've already got our plane tickets to Seattle. There's just one thing left to iron out."
"What's that bro?"
"Can your Dad take us to the airport. Tomorrow?" There's a pause on both ends as this sinks in, then Jason finishes, "We need to be there by 6am for our flight."
In my mind I begin to register what he's saying. 6am, Tomorrow, Seattle, Flight... Holy sh...
"Jason? Tomorrow? We leave for Alaska tomorrow?"
"Yeah. Did I forget to tell you when the trip was?"
"Yes. I think you forgot to mention that. Hold on." No turning back now I figure, the ball has already been set in motion. Might as well roll with it. I cover the mouthpiece to the phone and yell to my Dad, "Hey Pop! Can you give Jason and me a ride to the airport in the morning? We need to be there by 6!"
My Dad, firmly planted in the Archie Junker chair reading his daily paper, folds down a corner of his paper to look at me and says, "Ummm sure. Why?"
I brace for the response to this answer, "We are flying to Seattle. We're gonna work on a boat going to Alaska."
A semi-puzzled look comes across Dad's face and then as though he knows something better than I do he smiles and says, "Sure thing," and promptly goes back to his paper.
I stare at him for a moment. His non-chalant attitude about this is kind of weird, I think. I really expected him to respond in a much more animated way. Telling me how dangerous a job on a boat in Alaska can be, or how I shouldn't be so reckless with my life, or that something like this should be more planned out. No, none of that. Just a "Sure thing," and that was it.
I return to the phone, "Jason? He'll do it."
"Great!"
"Ok man, I gotta run. I need to go to the thrift store."
"Why?"
"Jason. I didn't just get back from living in Colorado like you. I have no warm clothes. I don't think tank tops and shorts and flip flops will be appropriate attire in Alaska."
"Oh. Ok. I'll talk to you later!"
"Bye."
I hang up the phone and stare at the kitchen tiles for a moment. Their white ceramic reminding me of snow. Snow. I hadn't seen snow in quite some time. Not since my last visit to my Uncle Rick's in Carson City, NV. I hate the snow. What am I doing going to Alaska?
"Son?"
My father's voice pulls me abruptly out of my thoughts.
"Yeah, Dad?"
"You need to get going. It might take a couple of different stores to find warm clothes. This is San Diego after all."
I stare at my Dad again. Who is this man? He's always talking about making a plan for your life, and setting goals. This Alaska thing is probably the most impulsive thing I've ever done in my life and he's acting like I'm going to camp for the summer.
"Um... you're right Dad. Can I borrow some money?"
"Of course."
Weird... really, really, weird.
Ok, that's all for now. Part 3 to come soon!
-Dave
The Great Adventure
Part 1
Mid June 1993
So I've been out of high school for a month now. I've been enjoying my summer, for the most part. It has been made bittersweet by the sudden ending of my year long relationship with Tayva. God I love Tayva. Breaking up with her has been so difficult. I should have seen it coming. I've been so immature about so much of our relationship, I can't blame her for looking for what she needed somewhere else. But for her to leave me after all we shared, and immediately end up with someone else? That's hard to take. But I'm trying to be strong about this, and I'm trying desperately to hang on to all the friends we share. That's not easy since they pretty much all knew her first. I came into this circle because of her, and I'm afraid I'll find myself out of it for the same reason.
Anyway, it's Thursday and nothing much has been going on today. Jason called me tonight and said he had a problem that he needed my opinion on. This has of course made me very pleased, since Jason is one of the friends I am fearful of losing because of my fallout with Tayva. For him to seek my advice on a personal problem is comforting. It means I might not lose all my friends after all.
Jason's problem is, in my opinion, a fairly simple one. He and his father haven't gotten along in years. In fact, his Dad lives in Alaska and Jason rarely sees or hears from him. It seems Jason's dad (Lee), has found himself stranded in Seattle, WA for some reason. I guess he was down there for a job or something, regardless he's had to find himself a way home to Anchorage. Lee hunted around and eventually found a boat that needs a crew for a trip to Anchorage. The boat is an old Navy Land, Craft, Utility (LCU) vessel that was bought by an oil rig company in Anchorage for use as a supply ship. They bought the boat in Santa Barbara and have been piloting it up the West Coast towards Alaska. Somewhere just before they reached Puget Sound they blew out their engines. So the ship and the original crew have been holed up in Westport, WA for three months or so while the engines get rebuilt. As a result, the oil company has recalled the original crew because of a "days out" limit. They reached it weeks ago. So now they need people to man this ship as it travels the Inside Passage and crosses the Gulf of Alaska to get to Anchorage. So Lee got himself on this crew as a means of working while he concurrently makes his way back home.
Ok, so what is Jason's problem exactly? Well... turns out Lee wants Jason to come up and work on the boat with him. The ship needs another deck hand and Lee volunteered Jason for the job. Jason says that they are going to pay him $250/day while he's working, and they'll pay for his flight back home. The only thing he has to pay for is getting to Seattle so that Lee can pick him up and take him over to Westport.
Jason would make enough money to pay for an entire year at the Junior College in a month. Cool, right? I thought so. But Jason doesn't think he can handle a month or two with his Dad on this ship. I asked him how big the ship is. He says it's 135 feet long and three decks. That seems like a big enough place to me. I suggested to Jason that he could handle it, that getting "away" from his father if he needed to wouldn't be that hard. He didn't agree.
I told him he'd be a fool if he didn't take the opportunity to make his next year of college financially easier to handle. He agreed, and said that the thought had already occurred to him. Turns out his request for advice was really turning into a, "help me say no to my father" call. While I understand the desire to flee from one of your parents, I could not, in good conscience, tell him to say no to this opportunity. Besides, it looked to me like his Dad was trying to offer an olive branch.
So I came up with a possible solution.
"Jason, do they have everyone they need? Or might they need another deck hand or something?"
There was a pause as Jason contemplated my questions.
Then he replied, "I don't know. Are you suggesting that you'd go too?"
"Naturally! I need to pay for school next year too. Besides, it sounds like fun."
There was another pause on the other end of the line, then Jason said, "I've got to call them and find out. I really don't know if there is any openings, but I'll ask and call you back!"
With that the line went dead and I began waiting for Jason's call. It's now 11:30pm and I haven't heard from Jason since that call a few hours back. I guess the answer was no. Either that, or Jason told his father to bugger off and he doesn't want to hear my objections to that. Whatever. I'm going to bed.
Part 2
So this morning I woke up around 8am. I still haven't heard from Jason and it's almost 10:30am now. It's Friday, so I'm naturally spending my day just lounging around the house. Dad's home. He's been home a lot since he was laid off by General Physics. It's interesting. He's working for himself now, doing Independent Contracting stuff. He seems happier, even though his income isn't as regular or as high as it was before. I really think the freedom of controlling your own destiny may have something to do with his more relaxed attitude.
10:30, the phone rings.
"Hello?"
"Dave! They need someone else, so my Dad got you hired!"
"Really? That's cool. So I guess we are going to do this then, huh Jason?"
"Yeah. I've already got our plane tickets to Seattle. There's just one thing left to iron out."
"What's that bro?"
"Can your Dad take us to the airport. Tomorrow?" There's a pause on both ends as this sinks in, then Jason finishes, "We need to be there by 6am for our flight."
In my mind I begin to register what he's saying. 6am, Tomorrow, Seattle, Flight... Holy sh...
"Jason? Tomorrow? We leave for Alaska tomorrow?"
"Yeah. Did I forget to tell you when the trip was?"
"Yes. I think you forgot to mention that. Hold on." No turning back now I figure, the ball has already been set in motion. Might as well roll with it. I cover the mouthpiece to the phone and yell to my Dad, "Hey Pop! Can you give Jason and me a ride to the airport in the morning? We need to be there by 6!"
My Dad, firmly planted in the Archie Junker chair reading his daily paper, folds down a corner of his paper to look at me and says, "Ummm sure. Why?"
I brace for the response to this answer, "We are flying to Seattle. We're gonna work on a boat going to Alaska."
A semi-puzzled look comes across Dad's face and then as though he knows something better than I do he smiles and says, "Sure thing," and promptly goes back to his paper.
I stare at him for a moment. His non-chalant attitude about this is kind of weird, I think. I really expected him to respond in a much more animated way. Telling me how dangerous a job on a boat in Alaska can be, or how I shouldn't be so reckless with my life, or that something like this should be more planned out. No, none of that. Just a "Sure thing," and that was it.
I return to the phone, "Jason? He'll do it."
"Great!"
"Ok man, I gotta run. I need to go to the thrift store."
"Why?"
"Jason. I didn't just get back from living in Colorado like you. I have no warm clothes. I don't think tank tops and shorts and flip flops will be appropriate attire in Alaska."
"Oh. Ok. I'll talk to you later!"
"Bye."
I hang up the phone and stare at the kitchen tiles for a moment. Their white ceramic reminding me of snow. Snow. I hadn't seen snow in quite some time. Not since my last visit to my Uncle Rick's in Carson City, NV. I hate the snow. What am I doing going to Alaska?
"Son?"
My father's voice pulls me abruptly out of my thoughts.
"Yeah, Dad?"
"You need to get going. It might take a couple of different stores to find warm clothes. This is San Diego after all."
I stare at my Dad again. Who is this man? He's always talking about making a plan for your life, and setting goals. This Alaska thing is probably the most impulsive thing I've ever done in my life and he's acting like I'm going to camp for the summer.
"Um... you're right Dad. Can I borrow some money?"
"Of course."
Weird... really, really, weird.
Ok, that's all for now. Part 3 to come soon!
-Dave
7/15/2004
Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one.
- Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one.
- Jane Howard, "Families"
Not that I'm complaining in any way! I love that my family feels like they can lean on me for support in their times of need. Honestly, that kind of faith in me is something that makes me feel special and needed.
Eric is a trip. We've not really seen one another much in the past 20 years or so. Actually, we hadn't seen each other in twenty years until Eric's dad died a couple of months ago. We reconnected at the funeral in Indiana.
It's really unfortunate that it often takes a death in a family to actually bring members of that family back together.
Anyway, while in Indiana I told Eric (who was living with Uncle Bob in Houston, TX when he died) that he was welcome to come and stay with me in SD if he'd like to come out. I wasn't just saying what I thought he wanted to hear, I truly meant it. I'll go out of my way to help out people I love. And I love all of my family members.
A few weeks went by and I figured Eric wasn't going to take any of us up on our offers (everyone offered similar helping hands to him). But two weeks ago Eric emailed me and said he was wondering if my offer still stood. Of course it did!
So Eric worked out a few, um, situations in Houston and Tulsa and made his way to SD. He finally arrived here Monday night. Naturally I spent all day Sunday and all day Monday desperately trying to clean house before his arrival. (Thanks to Teesa and Laura for all their help! Laura especially for doing so much without anyone asking her to.)
Teesa was also kind enough to donate her bed to Eric's needs. So by midday Monday, my messy storage room/bedroom had become a dorm style room for two.
Eric seemed pleased to find a bed waiting for him.
It's been a real treat having him here with us. His child like moments of amazement at his actually being here are wonderful. He says he's always wanted to return to SD (he was born here, after all), but he never thought he'd actually make it here it seems. We took him to Las Olas his first full day here and gave him a taste of some of SD's best mexican food. While we waited for our table we sat on the beach as the sun was setting. He spent a good deal of time just standing by the ocean staring out to sea. It was interesting watching him standing there, alone at the edge of the ocean.
I've found myself wondering several times since then, "what was he thinking at that moment?"
I'm sure his thoughts were on his father and on his mother and most likely on his own future.
He's made a big step in coming to San Diego. It's a long way from all that he's become used to in the midwest. He's been helping me park cars for the Surf Soccer Club all week. He's really gotten a kick out of working outside in the pleasant weather, amongst beautiful homes and people and getting paid to do it all.
Of course... he should have worn sunscreen. He's really red now. ;-)
Tomorrow we are doing a bonfire at Moonlight Beach in Encinitas. We're gonna hang at the beach for most of the day and show Eric what our summer's are like. It'll be, as my friend Daniel put it, "a good, relaxing, So-Cal kind of thing to do."
Amen brother... Amen!
-Dave
6/29/2004
A little nonsense now and then, is cherished by the wisest men.
A little nonsense now and then, is cherished by the wisest men.
Roald Dahl (1916 - 1990) (Willy Wonka) Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
My day started out kind of bland. The usual humdrums of existence weighing down upon me. I made my way out into the world before noon. I was hoping to get out sooner than that, but hey, I just couldn't get going, you know?
I went to AAA and finally got my truck insured and registered. It's nice to be able to drive the thing around and not worry about whether or not a cop is tailing me.
I came home and grabbed Donald, we drove to Solana Beach and loaded up a weight machine into my truck that was donated to the Surf Soccer Club. We then went over to the Soares' house and took some photos of a sweet 1930 Ford Model A that we are going to auction on eBay. (The weight set will be auctioned there too. Actually we are going to auction lots of stuff there in the future for the club.) The car was cool, and it was neat to see Donald enjoying that particular piece of history.
Actually, it's always nice to see someone looking upon something they really love. And Donald loves old cars. No doubt about that.
After doing the car thing I headed over to Alissa's. I wasn't sure about stopping by since she sent me a text message that said she was feeling "anti-social to most of the world" or something like that. But I took a gamble and stopped by anyway.
I'm glad I did. I was finally able to deliver the 5X7 of her I printed from our Vegas trip. It's a beautiful photo of a beautiful woman (it's of Alissa). Anyway I had it in a frame and all. She seemed to really like it. I think it may have brightened up her day a bit. We sat around and talked. It was nice. We haven't seen each other in a month since Vegas. But we seemed to just pick up right where we left off. I really enjoy that. I like having a friend that I can just sit with and connect to.
And speaking of connecting. It seems Bryan (with a Y) and I were on the same wavelength today and both had decided today was a good day to talk to one another. We talked for about an hour on the phone late tonight. He's doing really well. He's hit the 200 days sober mark and I am so VERY VERY PROUD of him. He's come a long way since he left San Diego. He even told me that he's agreed to start training for a manager's position at Humperdink's there in Arlington. That's a pretty big step for him. He's actually reached a point in his life where he feels ready to accept some responsibility. That's courageous and a great move forward in his attitude toward life. Way to go Bryan!
That's all for now I think. It's like 3:30am and I should really get to bed. I am going to see Spider Man at midnight tomorrow, er, tonight. And I should really get my beauty rest. I hope Spidey 2 is as good as the hype is making it out to be. I really like Sam Raimi, so it's definitely a hope I have for him to knock this one out of the park. He came damn close with the first one.
Until next time... be good! And if you can't be good, then be good at being bad!
-Dave
Roald Dahl (1916 - 1990) (Willy Wonka) Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
My day started out kind of bland. The usual humdrums of existence weighing down upon me. I made my way out into the world before noon. I was hoping to get out sooner than that, but hey, I just couldn't get going, you know?
I went to AAA and finally got my truck insured and registered. It's nice to be able to drive the thing around and not worry about whether or not a cop is tailing me.
I came home and grabbed Donald, we drove to Solana Beach and loaded up a weight machine into my truck that was donated to the Surf Soccer Club. We then went over to the Soares' house and took some photos of a sweet 1930 Ford Model A that we are going to auction on eBay. (The weight set will be auctioned there too. Actually we are going to auction lots of stuff there in the future for the club.) The car was cool, and it was neat to see Donald enjoying that particular piece of history.
Actually, it's always nice to see someone looking upon something they really love. And Donald loves old cars. No doubt about that.
After doing the car thing I headed over to Alissa's. I wasn't sure about stopping by since she sent me a text message that said she was feeling "anti-social to most of the world" or something like that. But I took a gamble and stopped by anyway.
I'm glad I did. I was finally able to deliver the 5X7 of her I printed from our Vegas trip. It's a beautiful photo of a beautiful woman (it's of Alissa). Anyway I had it in a frame and all. She seemed to really like it. I think it may have brightened up her day a bit. We sat around and talked. It was nice. We haven't seen each other in a month since Vegas. But we seemed to just pick up right where we left off. I really enjoy that. I like having a friend that I can just sit with and connect to.
And speaking of connecting. It seems Bryan (with a Y) and I were on the same wavelength today and both had decided today was a good day to talk to one another. We talked for about an hour on the phone late tonight. He's doing really well. He's hit the 200 days sober mark and I am so VERY VERY PROUD of him. He's come a long way since he left San Diego. He even told me that he's agreed to start training for a manager's position at Humperdink's there in Arlington. That's a pretty big step for him. He's actually reached a point in his life where he feels ready to accept some responsibility. That's courageous and a great move forward in his attitude toward life. Way to go Bryan!
That's all for now I think. It's like 3:30am and I should really get to bed. I am going to see Spider Man at midnight tomorrow, er, tonight. And I should really get my beauty rest. I hope Spidey 2 is as good as the hype is making it out to be. I really like Sam Raimi, so it's definitely a hope I have for him to knock this one out of the park. He came damn close with the first one.
Until next time... be good! And if you can't be good, then be good at being bad!
-Dave
6/25/2004
John Evelyn - “Friendship is the golden thread that ties the heart of all the world.”
Had dinner tonight with some old friends. Terry Park and Linda Sabo. Two of the coolest women you're ever likely to meet. We don't get together often enough, but when we do it is always a time filled with laughter and happiness.
I don't have lots of friends, and indeed I don't spend enough time with the ones I do have. But the quality of the time I spend with them is very high, and always worth my time spent.
-Dave
I don't have lots of friends, and indeed I don't spend enough time with the ones I do have. But the quality of the time I spend with them is very high, and always worth my time spent.
-Dave
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